*This article was originally published on author’s blog, a different version of this article was published on AfterEllen.
Why is nobody talking about cognitive brain development in the rush to “transition” kids?
In an interview with People, Ruby Rose revealed that after seeing a daytime documentary at age 5, she started saving money for ‘gender reassignment’ surgery. Rose, came out as a lesbian at age 12, and was bullied badly by her peers.
“I had this jar that I would collect dollars- in fact, we were so poor, it would have been cents. So I probably had 19 cents to go towards this surgery that I didn’t really know a lot about. I think I had seen like a daytime documentary, probably something on Oprah and I was like, ‘That’s what I’m going to do.’ And so I started saving from probably the age of 5.” — Ruby Rose
Imagine a world where someone like Ruby Rose could’ve been “affirmed,” “transitioned,” and become he/him, as a tiny human. That’s the world we’re living in right now.
Statistics show that more than 75% of the time these kids would desist, and likely grow up to be gay and lesbian. That number drops to around 0% with “early transition.” What’s happening right now is a massive human rights violation of lesbian and gay kids.
Labeling toddlers, medicalizing children, and doing double mastectomies on teens, way before they ever even have a chance to reach full cognitive brain development isn’t progressive. It’s child abuse.
By 15, Rose realized she didn’t want to transition. She just wanted to be comfortable.
“When I got to 15, was when I kind of decided to get more into my body, and I shaved my head… And I decided to change the way that I dressed and talked and realized that I didn’t want to transition, I just wanted to be more comfortable in my own skin.” —Ruby Rose
Baby dykes, who (surprise surprise) don’t always enjoy being crammed into the ruffle-covered pink box, often grow up thinking that we should’ve been boys. After all, boys get to do all the cool stuff and wear all the cool clothes. They get the girl. And we’re brainwashed by everything around us to believe in pink and blue boxes. Everything from magazines to billboards, TV, movies, literature… The list goes on and on. Processing all of this as a baby dyke is quite confusing, considering societal expectations and having a sexuality that’s not something often seen or taught as the ‘norm.’
And we’re trying to process it all before we’ve come even close to reaching full cognitive brain development, which happens in your mid twenties. All while submerged in a world that relentlessly pushes ‘norms’ and heterosexuality. A world obsessed with ‘gender-ing’ clothes, haircuts, colors, toys, games, hobbies, activities, jobs (and on and on)… It’s pretty easy for baby dykes, who like the ‘wrong stuff,’ to conclude that they were born in the ‘wrong’ box. Then they grow up and realize that the box, ‘femininity,’ has nothing to do with sex. The box is man-made.
When we finally realize this, we get mad. Maybe get a tattoo, maybe burn a bra. Because our brains, having reached full development, finally realize—hello—any toddler or child who wants to rock a mohawk, climb a tree and wear a plaid button-down shirt, is totally swaggerific, and these choices are not indicators of sex or even sexuality.
“Everyone had Barbies; I had ninja turtles and Superman… I was crazy about Archie comics. I played footie [soccer] with the boys… All I wanted was a boy’s name growing up — Charlie, Billie, Max, Frankie. You just know my mum wanted a girly girl princess!” —Ruby Rose
As a kid, my friends called me Jay. In High School, I was nicknamed Little Joe. Nowadays, I go by Romeo and JD, and Siri calls me ‘Big Daddy.’ Compulsory ‘femininity’ can certainly have that ‘eww’ effect on a girl. And it can follow you into womanhood. A given name sort of represents all of that, by no fault of its own. The name becomes merely guilty by association.
In college, I was a PSY major, and I later switched to LIT. Seeing how people in that field are being threatened with losing their jobs if they don’t play along, I’ve never been more sure of my decision to switch majors.
But that background in PSY is what fuels my fight against the pro child abuse culture being pushed by the male-dominated “LGBTQ” and enshrined into law.
And although I’ve searched, high and low, I can’t find anyone talking about how these decisions are being made way before a kid has a chance to grow up and reach full cognitive brain development. To the point that I even checked with a psychiatrist here in NY… I said (paraphrasing)—I know I may be a little rusty, but am I not saying this right? Full cognitive brain development? He said—Yup. That’s correct. And I pressed—That exact phrasing though? Because I keep saying that ‘these kids haven’t even come close to reaching full cognitive brain development’ and it feels like people, even in your field, aren’t getting it. Or maybe they’re scared to chime in. He said— Yup. You’re saying it absolutely right, and what you are saying is absolutely correct.
So, what’s with the changes to the American Psychological Association guidelines? Stonewall? GLAAD? In law, etc., etc.? Did everyone collectively decide to forget everything we know about brain development?
Why is the ‘LGBTQ’ ignoring liberal studies that show the majority of ‘non conforming’ kids grow up to be L & G? Why are they no longer protecting L & G kids who don’t conform? Why aren’t they considering various religions and conservative parenting, where a gay child is considered the worst possible scenario? Where abuse and shaming starts as young as with an 18 month old baby, for liking the “wrong” things? Why are they dismissing the vast melting pot of cultures and religions — Backgrounds where it’s punishable by death to be homosexual, but getting a “sex-change” is totally acceptable.
Lesbians have a very long history of giving the big FU to ‘gender’ stereotypes. Generally speaking, lesbians are pretty well-known for rejecting compulsory ‘gender’ stereotypes — roles, rules and expectations — boxes which are assigned to people, from the moment they’re born, on the basis of their sex. We say, ‘Nope. No thanks!’ And why wouldn’t we?
The idea that girlhood and womanhood are somehow defined by ‘femininity,’ is extremely sexist… and boring… and lame. Being a lesbian, in and of itself, is a form of ‘non-conformity,’ and lesbians are absolute pioneers when it comes to railing against the ‘norms.’
Some of us never realize that pink and blue boxes are nothing more than the grand design of the men that built them. Some of us never find our way out of internalized homophobia.
It’s why people, like Ellen DeGeneres, stay in the closet for so long. Kristen Stewart. Ellen Page. And that internalized homophobia is only exacerbated by a mainstream media that still won’t put a ‘butch’ lesbian in a main role on a mainstream TV show. There’s still only ever been one. ONE butch (IRL) lesbian actress cast in a main(ish) role (not to be confused with a lead role), on a mainstream TV show. As a child, it’s beyond confusing to only see yourself portrayed as a ‘she’s really a man’ punchline, if portrayed at all.
Right now, mainstream media will gladly cast anyone in a main role, with dignity and style, whether L, G, B, or T, but only if they’re willing to play by the rules of ‘gender.’
Young lesbians need role models. The real deal. The kind who don’t conform to the ‘norms’ of ‘gender.’ The role models we have? Look at what happens when a lesbian ‘comes out’ in the industry, the opportunities suddenly become scarce. What does that say to young people?
Young lesbians need a chance to grow up. Our journey through childhood and teenager-hood and even young adulthood is very unique. So while people keep screaming that they’re on “the right side of history,” all I see are kids like me, and my wife, and every single one of our friends. Kids like Ruby Rose and Rupert Everett. Because this isn’t the “right side of history.” It’s massive human rights violation of lesbian and gay kids. It’s feel-good homophobia. It’s child abuse wrapped in a propaganda rainbow.
جوليا ديانا —JD Robertson, is an award-winning author, and a contributor for Huffington Post and AfterEllen—A first generation Arab-American, who grew up between worlds, and currently resides somewhere in the middle with a bird’s eye view. You can find her at www.juliadianarobertson.com
